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Your Career North Star
Staying on course during personal and professional crosswinds
"Thanks for the job offer. It sounds great. Can I get back to you in 5 years?" I was facing some of my own "crosswinds" in personal and professional balancing when I asked that question. You're going to face yours. How will you chart your course? How will you combine your values, personal hopes and professional expertise to achieve that infamous "work/ life balance" we hear so much about?

The safest rule for planning how to balance your personal and professional lives is:

There is no rule. There is constant realignment and rebalance. Sometimes, the professional side will rule, sometimes, the personal one. On occasion, there will be a balance. The steady state comes from you, with how you respond to the continual shifting and how you use short term, creative problem solving to set you up for your long term objectives.

Sorry. I didn't say this was going to be easy. It might be fun, though. Let's start with the "long term objective" part. Having an idea of where you want to be in 10 years is a good start. This is not an interview question. This is a gut-level reflection of where your professional passions and your personal goals and values intersect. Fantasize for a while, pulling apart your personal, professional, family, spiritual, health, and financial goals to get a rough idea of where you'd like to head. This is hard, but essential, work.

Recognizing where your professional passions are and where you want to develop your expertise over the years will give you a Career North Star. Don't worry if your long term goal doesn't feel 100% correct yet. If you freeze yourself into inaction by waiting for everything to become clear, it never will. Take your best shot at where you'd like to be, then start developing some small, action steps to get yourself there. You can correct the course as you go, if you need to.

Developing action steps to reach your Career North Star will fall into different categories:

Running with the wind. The wind is behind you now, blowing you in the right direction in your career. Your work, your company, your daycare for the children, the health of your parents, etc. is all in good shape. Odds are that you are now taking on more responsibility at work and, as a result, starting to test that fine equilibrium of personal/professional balance. That's natural. Being willing to push yourself may be the reason for your current success. While things are going well is the time to build your reputation, your expertise, your resources. Staying connected with people and trends outside of your company not only benefits your organization, it makes you more competitive.

Tacking. You can't head straight for your goal. The wind is blowing towards you, so you need to take short deviations to the right and the left that head you towards your goal in a zig-zag pattern. You've been laid off, you want to spend more time with your children, you're feeling burned out, a family member is acutely sick. Creativity and negotiating skills can help you decide on the best tack. If you're employed, present to your boss what you would like to have happen and why it will benefit the company. Your boss isn't going to come to you with the solutions, but may well want to retain you. If you're not employed, this is an opportunity to create how your future work will help you reach your Career North Star rather than react to whatever falls in your lap.

Becalmed. You're "dead in the water," (professional water, at least), no wind. There may be a Career North Star, but you have no way of getting there right now. Sometimes, it's for positive reasons: you've had a second child, you're recently married, your company has been acquired. You've chosen to stop working to reassess or to enjoy your personal life. Sometimes, you've stopped for negative reasons, often related to health.

Regardless, if your Career North Star includes being back in play at some point in the future, it's important to keep in touch. If you have time for only one activity, it's to keep parts of your network alive. Ask colleagues to lunch or breakfast on their turf. Meet them at a conference. Interview them for an article you're writing. Stay at least somewhat visible to different parts of your network (different companies, vendors, customers, competitors, consultants, etc.). E-mail does wonders.

Here's the tricky part: have a little something of value to offer these people when you re-connect. It can be a Fast Company article of interest; it can be a lead on potential business; it can be volunteering to help them on a conference. You want to motivate them to continue to think of you for the long term. It's also fun because you're helping your friends. They'll want to return the favors if you decide to re-enter professional waters later on.

Charting the course. You don't have complete control over your personal and professional balance, but you have more than you might realize. Focus on your long term Career North Star, what your professional expertise is and how you'll achieve mastery, then start on those small, action steps. Accept, and even enjoy, the crosswinds along the way.
 
Pam Lassiter is Principal of Lassiter Consulting, an executive career management firm . She teaches a career management course for HBSAB.
 

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